It is almost impossible to avoid people with narcissistic traits. For some of you they will be family members you want to stay in contact with but that contact is really painful. For others they may be a friend, colleague, boss or perhaps just someone you encounter through your every day business.
If you have empath tendencies it will be particularly important to take good care of yourself emotionally when around someone with narcissistic tendencies. You are like a sponge absorbing the emotions of those around you and some emotions are damaging for you.
“With their self-absorption, entitlement, trigger-quick defenses, it is clear that narcissists have not developed adult coping mechanisms. The height of futility comes when you respond just as poorly in reverse.“
Psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter
Psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter explains how you can maintain maturity even in the midst of the narcissist’s childlike immaturity. It requires you to think independently, not letting the narcissist set your agenda. Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who lives in Dallas, Tx. In the past 39 years he has conducted over 60,000 counseling sessions and many seminars and workshops.”
Click here to watch a video on maintaining your mature responses to a narcissist on Dr Les Carter’s Youtube Blog “Surviving Narcissism”
If the vision perfection that this picture presents resonates with you as a falsehood that hides a whole lot of hurt, then may be your mother (or father) has narcissistic traits. A narcissistic parent likes to creates a vision of perfection for the world to see. People outside the family will see your family as healthy and perfect and image that belies the emotional damage (and other types of abuse ) that happens within the family home.
I was recently recommended this video on YouTube by Johanna Kujath a psychologist. She describes the traits of a narcissistic mother as she sees them. She also takes time to explain the impact a mother with these traits has on her daughter.
If from watching this video you consider that may be you have a narcissistic parent or partner, below is a video from Dr Les Carter who provides a blog for people affected by people with narcissistic traits. He offers some sound advice on how to cope and protect yourself from the effects of emotional abuse in the video entitled “The I Refuse Approach to communication with a narcissist.” His emphasis is on staying true to yourself.
If you like his video you might like to try this video which helps you to understand why you feel so angry when you are around narcissistic people or alternatively you can subscribe to his blog. He offers some sound advice on how to understand narcissism and how to support yourself when you are in the company of a narcissist.
Are you struggling to get to sleep at night? May be you have already tried different techniques but not found anything to break through the shield of alertness and worry so that you can immerse yourself in relaxation and sleep.
Much has been written and research has shown how a cat’s purring can aid relaxation and sleep. It helps to lower our heart rate, slow down our metabolism and prepare for sleep.
Having a cat around you can actually trigger the release of calming chemicals in your body which lower your stress and anxiety levels. The calming effect of owning a cat triggers the release of oxytocin, the hormone known for inducing feelings of love and trust. People going through difficult times of grief or mourning report that talking to their pet helps work out their feelings, since it is often easier to talk to something that won’t respond and can’t judge than to another human being. In addition, a study found that children with autism were more likely to be less anxious and calm while petting a cat.
Well the internet now has a cat!
His/her name is Purli and you can set Purli to purr and occasionally Mew in a way that suits you. Purli is a recording of a continuous cat purr which has been designed to aid rest and sleep.
Have you ever wondered why you keep ending up with abusive, narcissistic type people?
Clients have often described how they feel like they attract the wrong people or they must have a sign on them that attracts narcissistic people. Do you rack your brains trying to find out what it is about you that attracts such people?
Well one possible answer is that you might be an empath.
Empaths and narcissists attract each other and fit together like hand and glove. Even though it is an uncomfortable, abusive and unhappy experience for you, you still somehow keep ending up still end in these relationships.
Abdul Saad, a psychologist from Australia has his own understanding on this phenomenon. Below is a link to his talk about the empath in this dynamic and in particular focussing on the Empaths inner beliefs that keep them stuck.