One of the most acute questions we ask ourselves in relation to new friends and acquaintances is whether or not they like us. The question feels so significant because, depending on how we answer it in our minds, we will either take steps to deepen the friendship or, as is often the case, immediately make moves to withdraw from it so as to spare ourselves humiliation and embarrassment.
But what is striking and sad is how essentially passive we are in relation to this enquiry. We assume that there is a more or less binary answer, that it is wholly in the remit of the other person to settle it – and that there is nothing much we could do to shift the verdict one way or the other. Either someone wants to be our friend – or they don’t – and the answer, while it is about us, is essentially disconnected from any of our own initiatives.
The link below will connect you to a video produced by the School of Life on just this topic. The aim of it is to help you understand the complexities of our early meetings with people and how we can influence the outcomes unwittingly.
Click here to view the video